Passing it On

Psalm 145:4 " One generation will praise Your works to another, and will declare Your mighty acts." Wow! That's a lot of responsibility! What am I passing on to my kids, to those I come in contact with on a daily basis? To those I meet or deal with during the course of my day, especially those younger than me? The Jewish people have passed on traditions such as Passover for generations. I don't think we have been as successful. I need to be intentional in sharing, showing God's faithfulness in my life. There was a song I used to sing as a young girl involved in Pioneer Girls that went like this; "It only takes a spark, to get a fire going. And soon all those around, can warm up to it's glowing. That's how it is with God's love. Once you've experienced it, you want to know, you want to show, you want to pass it on." I didn't even think of that song until I had already titled my post and was into writing this! God just brought it to mind. Lord, help me to pass it on, to be intentional in showing and telling others of the wonderful things You have done for me, of how You have met my every need.

Grace

2 Peter 3:18a "But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ" I was reading in my devotional about that verse, growing in grace. What is grace? God has given us grace abundantly so how do I grow in grace? I was challenged to do an acrostic of grace. G= generously given R=received unworthily A=accepted gratefully C=covered abundantly E=eternally saved. Maybe thinking about, meditating on and being thankful for the grace He has given me and trying to share His grace with others is all part of growing. Our pastor has been talking about starting big things that will go on after we leave this earth, something akin to a legacy. Could I leave a legacy that shows His grace? I have spoken many times in this blog about this year. God is doing miraculous things in my life this year. Many things have been and continue to be hard. I want to be a rock, a tree, planted with roots deep and standing firm. I want to show love and mercy. His grace has covered me so I need to show that same attitude in my day to day interactions with others. I have done nothing to deserve His grace and yet He heaps it on me. How can I not give it away freely to those around me by forgiving, showing kindness, and downright just loving on people?! John 1:16 says from His fulness we receive grace upon grace. It reminds me of standing with my feet in the ocean as the waves just keep rolling in, grace upon grace. But I can only grow in grace and show grace to others if I stay fully abiding in Him. His grace will overflow to those around me if I am intentional about being rooted in Him and allowing Him to use me.

His Ways

I am so thankful for Isaiah 55:8&9! Isaiah 55:8&9 "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts." God most certainly has the best plan for us. If you had told me in January of this year, that I would be where I am today, I wouldn't have believed it. When I lost my job in July, it felt like chaos and uncertainty and downright fear. Greg and I were intentional in trusting Him with providing for us, to meet our financial and basic daily needs, as well as my mental need to feel like there was hope. Did I think that what I was going through was best for me? For us? No way! Even though this situation is not yet closed, I am far better off than I was in July! God has provided me with a new job that pays more, better benefits, better working conditions, closer to home and much opportunity! I could not have asked for more! One week into this new position and I am absolutely loving it! One of the mission statements of the company is to do the right thing for the right reason! God is giving me an opportunity to share the good news and shine His light and love into the lives of others! I was reading in my daily devotional about being "root bound". A plant can look healthy from the top, but will not produce new growth if its roots are in a tangled, compacted mess. A plant will grow, be healthy and produce new growth when the roots have room to spread.I am like that plant! I must keep my roots in Him, but continue to grow deeper. It isn't always comfortable. I need to step out in faith, to be confident through a deeper relationship with Him, to go beyond my comfort level and trust Him to do what is best for me. I am not in control, He is. He is the driver. This is my year of giving Him control and watching while He blows my mind with blessing!

Ever Faithful

Our God is ever faithful and always provides! Started my new job today, challenging but once I get this under my belt, I am going to love it! Great company and terrific coworkers! He has been faithful to guide Greg and I this year and boy, what I story we will have to tell of His peace, provision and direction in our lives!

The Shadow of His Wings

Psalm 36:7" How precious is Your lovingkindness, O God! The people take refuge in the shadow off Your wings." I'm seeking refuge in Him. It's probably not a good day for me to post as I don't want to come across negative. Dad, my brother and my sister and I did a conference call and have decided to put a feeding tube in mom. She's down to about 90 lbs. and not eating. It is so hard to get her medicine into her, she spits it out. This is really hard on my dad. He sits with her at the rehab center from 7:30 in the morning until the staff puts her to bed at night. Most of the time she is fine but days like yesterday and today are tough because she tells him to leave and this morning hit him in the mouth. It's the Parkinson's playing tricks on her mind but it tears my heart. She has always been so loving and kind. Dad reads the Bible to her and prays with her but I know she doesn't grasp anything right now. Yesterday, dad and I were able to get mom to eat a jello which felt like such an accomplishment, today, nothing. On a positive note, the follow-up CT scan that Greg had done last Friday was clear! Thank you Jesus! Whatever was going on in his lungs in June/July has resolved. In our online Bible Study, the hashtag this week is #Movingforward. The author spoke about being intentional in listening to the "right" voice. We will hear many voices in any given situation. When going through troubled times, I need to be still and seek Him, listening for His still, small voice to speak truth in my life and in my heart. I picture myself still and small, nestled under His wings, listening for His voice of love, mercy and kindness to lead me in the path of His choosing. It is in taking refuge in Him that I feel the most at peace, the most comfortable with the situations in my life. I don't have to do it alone, I only need to hide in Him, to claim His promises as His child, knowing that it is His strength that will get me through! But even so, I do not want to stay rooted in uncertainty but move forward knowing that my God will perform wonderful things in my life.He is my all in all!

A Big Day

I'm confident in my God's ability to clear me. I know I'm speaking somewhat veiled but I cannot go into this any clearer right now. My God is my all. If not for Him these past few months, I would've given up. He can do all things. Psalm 63:7 "For Thou hast been my help, and in the shadow of Thy wings I sing for joy."

#Perfectlove

In reading Chapter 2 of Renee Swope's book "A Confident Heart", she says,'if we only live on the surface with God, we'll never experience the intimacy we long for or the acceptance and security He offers." She goes on to say, "A personal relationship with God sets us free to be all we were created to be". These two ideas really made me think. I want to go deeper. I believe there is a hole in each human that longs for Him. We try to fill that hole with love from another, alcohol, parties, whatever. We search to "find ourselves" thinking that something is going to give us that moment when we say, "Yes! I've reached my self-fulfillment". But, only through a deeper, more intimate relationship with Him, will I finally find satisfaction and fulfillment. I was created to love Him, to serve Him, to be in a relationship with Him. And not just an acquaintance but in a meaningful relationship. When self-doubt tells me that I will never be good enough, that there is something that I'm missing and am too dumb to figure it out, that He wouldn't care to spend time with me or to watch over me and be intimate with me, I will remember Philippians 1:6 "For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Jesus Christ".

A Confident Heart and bearing fruit

I just started an amazing study with many women, online! I have only read the first chapter and I am already blessed and so excited to read more! God blesses us with many different blessings when we need it the most! He uses something different each time. I had been clinging to Jeremiah 29:11 since July when it felt like everything in my life fell apart. I have 2 new verses this week, Jeremiah 17:7-7 "Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord. For he will be like a tree planted by the water, that extends its roots by a stream and will not fear when the heat comes, but its leaves will be green, and it will not be anxious in a year of drought nor cease to yield fruit." Both Greg and I have talked about what a story we will be able to tell at the end of this year. God is so faithful! Greg went into business for himself in February. He cut off his finger in March and has had three surgeries and miraculously, it does not look too bad! We continue to pray for jobs for him. Being self-employed is difficult. Mom's health has been deteriorating, at first slowly. I was fired in July, with an ongoing saga that will hopefully be finished after my appointment on October 24th. God knew that dad and mom would need help and so, being unemployed, first time in my life!, I have been able to help out. Mom has gotten worse so quickly since July. She is currently in the hospital, the tenth time in the past two and a half months. She has new onset of seizures, never had seizures before. Kristen started college at the end of August. Greg and I are adjusting to our "empty nest". And Lord-willing, I will be starting a new job November 18th, in a field I have been interested in for several years but never had the confidence to try! If I do get this job, my pay is comparable to what I had been making, and the benefits exceed all that I have ever had! God is amazing! Please pray that through all, Greg and I will remain like that tree, planted by the water with our roots extended to Him so no matter what comes in our lives, we stand strong and yield fruit!

October

Wow! It's October already! So much going on. I was indeed offered the position and am now just waiting on the background check. Starting date is November 18, 2013! I've got my fingers crossed that this works out and I'm very excited! More of that later. Greg has a job through next week and then nothing, praying something comes about. God is able! He alone provides and cares for us like no one else can. Greg and I went to the cabin this past weekend for a much needed rest and get away. Awesome time together! Short and sweet!

God is Good

God is so good! I have been trying to have peace over this situation with my previous employer and I keep leaving it in God's hands only to take it back again. I received a call the other night from the job I interviewed for 2 wks ago. I am one of their top choices! I completed Step 2 of the process yesterday. Praying that He will work this out as I really would love this job, but only if it is His will and where He wants me to be. I have been doing my Bible study in Isaiah. I read this , Isaiah 43:1 But now, thus says the Lord, your Creator, O Jacob, and He who formed you, O Israel, Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine! Isn't that awesome?! Our God, Creator, Ruler of the universe cares enough to call me by name! He desires a relationship with me and wants to show me how His plan is for my greatest blessing!Family update: God is giving Greg work on a week to week basis. I know He will meet our needs. Josh is doing well, working a lot. Kristen is loving college and I see real changes in her walk with the Lord! Me? Well, to be continued...!

Who Can You Trust?

That was the title of today's study that I am currently doing. It is a study on the book of Isaiah called Trusting God in Troubled Times. I read two verses that grabbed me this morning, Isaiah 30:15 & 18 vs 15 says:For thus the Lord God,the Holy One of Israel, has said, In repentance and rest you shall be saved, In quietness and trust is your strength. vs 18:Therefore the Lord longs to be gracious to you, and therefore He waits on high to have compassion on you. For the Lord is a God of justice; How blessed are all those who long for Him. Isn't it amazing? Repentance AND rest, quietness AND trust. He LONGS to be gracious to us, to have compassion on us if we just repent, rest, be quiet and trust. I should be getting an answer this week as to whether I will be offered the case management job. The interview was long but went very well. I am really interested and I think it would be a great change and a good fit with where I am at in my life.I am also still waiting to tie up a more important loose end. More on that later. I'm trusting you, Lord!

Awesomeness!

I don't know if that is a word, but to me it describes God! I was very nervous regarding my unemployment hearing yesterday. When I opened Facebook, God spoke to me, right away. Psalm 118:6 The Lord is for me, so I will have no fear. What can mere people do to me? I remained nervous but felt my confidence in Him. Anyway, my previous employer did not show up to the hearing even they were the ones appealing my unemployment. Thank you Jesus! I have an interview this Friday which I am so looking forward to. Greg's work remains steady, thank you Jesus, and as my brother, Sean said, God is really giving us our DAILY bread. Not our monthly or yearly, but our daily bread, learning to trust Him for our day to day needs. God is good all the time!

Another reminder

Still waiting. I was scrolling through the blogs I read almost every morning and on Pastor Pete's blog I see this verse: Psalm 27:14 Wait for the Lord;be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. God is definitely teaching me patience!

Waiting

Exodus 14:14 Remain calm; the Lord will fight for you. His job is to fight, my job is to trust. Just trust. Not direct, not to question.... my job is to pray and wait.

Great is Thy Faithfulness

Great is Thy faithfulness... Greg and I took Kristen to college this past Saturday. Kristen and I drove down early with a jeep full of her things, wondering how the two of us were going to carry everything up to her room on the second floor. I have to say, worry is a waste of time! We pulled in to Eastern University and we were blown away! Everything was organized from volunteer parents directing us where to go, where to park, handing out water bottles, to getting out of our car in front of her dorm and being met by more volunteers and the boys Lacrosse team, ready to empty and carry everything from our car to her room! We checked in with her RA and by that time, the boys had all her belongings in her room! It was wonderful! The entire day was fantastic and welcoming. Kristen and I unpacked and arranged all her things, made her bed, hung decorations and pictures. We went and got her school ID and parking permit, ate lunch and had maybe 20 minutes before Greg came down around 2:40pm. There was a parent's lounge where I went while she took care of getting her ID and parking permit. In the parent's lounge was refreshments, papers to help with our adjustment of letting go, a place to write a letter to our sons/daughters which the school will deliver to her room today and some stones. Stones? Yes, small colorful stones that we could take and keep in our pocket so that every time we feel that stone, we can pray for our student. Greg, Kristen and I headed to the meeting for parents and students at 3pm and it opened with everyone singing Great is Thy Faithfulness. I haven't sung that hymn in so long and didn't think much about it other than thinking how wonderful it is to have Kristen choose a christian college. Everyone was so nice and really made us feel at home. After that meeting, there was a small reception before Greg and I headed home at 5pm, leaving Kristen for the first time away from home. Yesterday was really busy and this morning as I sat and had my devotions, it hit me! No, not the sadness of being away from Kristen, but the words to that hymn! Great is Thy faithfulness, Oh God our Father. All I have needed Thy hand has provided! We are going through so much right now. I am still unemployed and waiting for some extremely stressful things to work themselves out, Greg is newly self-employed, mom is getting so much worse, so quickly and Kristen is at college.God knew that dad would need more help with mom at this time and I am here to help. God knows we are struggling financially and has the perfect solution, we just need to wait and trust. God knew we were missing our "baby" and yesterday's message was on parenting and the empty nest syndrome. God is in control and great is His faithfulness. Morning by morning new mercies I see. All I have needed His hand has provided. What an awesome reminder!

My Garden

I just love to grow and can my own vegetables! Call me crazy but it is so satisfying to go downstairs and grab a jar of spaghetti sauce or diced tomatoes that I grew and preserved. Yesterday, I did 8 qts of spaghetti sauce. I have approximately 20-25 qts of dill and bread and butter pickles that I've done in the past month.This year Greg and I tried something new as well. We have a large crock and currently have old-fashioned dill pickles, like I used to get in a barrel at the deli, fermenting. It takes 4-6 weeks, so we'll see how they turn out.I still need to do tomato soup but that will have to wait until we get back from vacation. God is so good! Lots of basil in our garden this year! I could have used more cilantro and definitely more oregano. I'll probably plant more of each upon our return and then bring it in when it gets cold. I also did jam for the first time this year. I made strawberry, raspberry and grape and it turned out delicious! So much easier than I thought. Each year I'd like to try something new.

Monday

So much to do! We are leaving for our family vacation tomorrow afternoon to go out west! So happy as my son, daughter and husband all are going as well as Josh's girlfriend and one of my daughter's best friends. We will fly in to Las Vegas, spend a day then drive to Zion Nat'l Park then head to my sister in law's house in Utah. Spend 2 days there where we will go to Bryce Nat'l Park and head back to Vegas. Spend the night then we go to Cali- Laguna Beach for 2 days then back to Vegas for the night and come home 6:30 am the following Wednesday morning. Though we have been to Vegas and the Nat'l parks before, the kids were young and our 2 guests have not been there. Cali will be a first for all of us.Today is wash, processing tomatoes so they don't spoil and packing. Mom is in the hospital, she went in yesterday and has been undergoing testing for spinal meningitis.Prayers appreciated. My poor dad has been by her side and has not gotten any sleep.He is so dedicated. Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and courageous... for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.

In His Hands

I have done everything I need to do in regards to the current situation I am in. It is totally in His hands now. Praying for a new job and trusting that He will bring it on! Praying for Greg to keep getting work as well. My baby, Kristen goes to Eastern in just 3 short weeks! Her cross country team will be going to Maine for some team time and I was trying to work out how to get her there for the last couple of days of it. All it takes is money! Today I'm clinging to Psalm 27:13&14 I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. I'm waiting....

Another Day

Biopsies on Greg's lymph nodes around and in his lungs came back negative! So thankful! Still struggling with trust and not worrying but it is just a continual battle. Today is another beautiful day! Had an awesome time with my brother, sister-in-law and their 4 kids last week and this past weekend! So glad they came up from Georgia and we had the time to spend with them. Isaiah 41:13 I am the Lord your God. I am holding your hand, so don't be afraid. I am here to help you.

Trust

Trust.... so easy to say, so hard to do. Lord, I trust you, then I pull it back and start to worry again. Currently going through one of the roughest times of my life. Everything is up in the air. I'm clinging to Jeremiah 29:11-13. Nights are the toughest as I lay and think and worry. I have to continually give it back to Him and know, not just in my head but also in my heart, my entire being, that He is in control and trust Him to do what is best for me. If it were just me, it wouldn't be so bad. But everyone is affected by my not working. How will we pay the mortgage? Kristen leaves for Eastern University at the end of August, we were supposed to take vacation, all of us, the middle of August and put money down on our flights and hotel. God I trust you, help me to relinquish control

Learning to Trust

I'm learning to trust Him and it isn't always easy! I'm waiting on Him as He has a job for me and I'm impatient and would like to know now. If I let myself think about all the circumstances of losing my job and the uncertainty of finding another, I could lose my mind! He has big plans for us this year! Greg has never been one to be sick or hurt in a big way......until this year. Greg stepped out with his own company this year, February 1st. He nearly cut his finger off and has had three surgeries on it since but it is doing really well. Then 2 weeks ago, Greg ends up in the hospital for 3 days with a fever of 103 and after much testing, the docs still don't know why. But, they found some abnormal findings in his chest X-ray so they did a CT scan with contrast which confirmed that there are abnormal findings and so on Friday, Greg had several biopsies taken from the lymph nodes in and around his lungs. We won't have those results until the end of this week. So, I'm clinging to these verses: Proverbs 3:5&6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight. Isaiah 41:10 Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with my right hand. Jeremiah 29:11-13 "For I know the plans that I have for you", declares the Lord, plans to make you prosper and to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. Learning to trust.....not so easy....

All Sorts of New

Once again , it's been too long between posts! Like the title states, we have all sorts of new in our lives! Kristen is gearing up to go too Eastern University at the end of August. She is going in as a Junior since she has so many credits. She will also be running cross country for EU. Greg resigned from his job at the end of January to start his own business. That has brought mostly ups but a few downs. He nearly cut his finger off in March, has had three surgeries on it and is still going for therapy. Then he became ill with 103 fever and was hospitalized for several days. Never found out what caused the fever but they found several small nodules in his lungs and enlarged lymph nodes near his trachea. He is scheduled for a biopsy tomorrow morning under general anesthesia so prayers would be appreciated. I'm currently unemployed and looking for a job in case management or insurance. My back just won't handle hard work.We also got a new puppy! Boomer, our 9 wk old golden retriever, has been quite the handful! Pray for God's guidance as we continue this new phase of our lives.